Monday, February 06, 2006

I'm systematically becoming worse and worse at updating this thing. A lot of our friends and family read it to stay updated on the progress of the band, and I really like that. I hate hate hate repeating myself (wow, there's hypocrisy for you), so if everyone can just take two minutes and read this, it saves me a lot of time and keeps my jaw untired. Sometimes I feel bad because everyone has to hear about our adventures from just my perspective. I feel that you tend to miss out on a lot of things. For instance, whenever I tell stories about our shows, nine times out of ten it's me telling stories about the other band members.

I'll be honest, I don't usually like talking about myself. I tend to be a pretty funny guy and yet, as soon as someone starts a video camera rolling, or someone talks to me at a show, the pressure is on and I become a boring pile of skin and bones. My apologies for that.
I think I have that disorder where you're afraid of people. I don't remember what it's called off the top of my head, and I don't feel like looking it up. It's hilarious to me that I don't like being in or around large groups of people, and yet I decided to make being in a band my goal in life. Sometimes I don't quite think things through.

If I go to a show and there's a lot of people there, you'll find me in the back hanging out at the bar with the soccer moms who brought their kids to the show.
Moral of the story? If you talk to me before or after we play a show, rest assured that I'm really nervous and may not understand why you want to talk to me. After we play, I don't always feel impressive. If I'm sweaty, I don't look impressive, and you can pretty much bet I don't smell impressive either. Just approach me slowly. Pretend I'm a wild animal. Okay, not in that way.
Sometimes I wonder if people think I'm a jerk because I don't like to stand around and chit chat for hours after we play. I'm not that guy. It's not that I don't like you, just know that I'm either trying to load out, sell merch, or looking frantically around the room for someone I know. In fact, just wait until I have two drinks in me before you even attempt conversation. I get really loud after a few, and at that point, I'll talk to you until you're blue in the face or dead.

I'm a shy person. When I'm on stage, I'm not always me. I don't know who I am, but it's not me. Stage-me talks too much and says things he can only get away with while on stage with a band. Normal-me makes the same bad jokes over and over and is generally uninteresting. Don't confuse the two.
See, even now. I don't know what to say about me. I'm squirming in my chair.

This is going nowhere.

Listen to Inkwell.


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